Friday, June 25, 2010
Thursday, June 17, 2010
this, that and 4 goldfish
A frightening thing happened yesterday. I had spilt red wine on a pair of beige pyjama pants of my boyfriends and he turned wild. I have never seen him that angry. He had me against the wall with a clenched fist ready to punch me. He did not hit me, but I was sure he would.
Over a drop of wine on his pyjama pants.
I’m still trying to figure it all out and I’m still trying to decide what I’m going to do about it. I guess I’m still in shock. This is the gentlest human being I’ve ever known. Would not hurt a fly. Only, he went berserk over a pair of pants. Not even pants you would wear out. I’ve been the victim of an abusive relationship. There were drugs involved back then, so I know that had a lot to do with it, but this, eish… I don’t know. Anyway – that’s my drama and now it’s out there.
Yesterday was a public holiday in SA. Youth day. I took advantage of the day off to set up the fish tank I bought a few months ago. I was like a little kid cleaning and scrubbing and setting it all up. I even went and bought fish! 4 fish, R100.00 and I can not even eat them. Anyway, I went with goldfish because they are easy and seeing as this is my first attempt at keeping fish I decided they would be the best bet to get into it.
They are just so bloody cute. I even took a picture :)
Over a drop of wine on his pyjama pants.
I’m still trying to figure it all out and I’m still trying to decide what I’m going to do about it. I guess I’m still in shock. This is the gentlest human being I’ve ever known. Would not hurt a fly. Only, he went berserk over a pair of pants. Not even pants you would wear out. I’ve been the victim of an abusive relationship. There were drugs involved back then, so I know that had a lot to do with it, but this, eish… I don’t know. Anyway – that’s my drama and now it’s out there.
Yesterday was a public holiday in SA. Youth day. I took advantage of the day off to set up the fish tank I bought a few months ago. I was like a little kid cleaning and scrubbing and setting it all up. I even went and bought fish! 4 fish, R100.00 and I can not even eat them. Anyway, I went with goldfish because they are easy and seeing as this is my first attempt at keeping fish I decided they would be the best bet to get into it.
They are just so bloody cute. I even took a picture :)
Tuesday, June 15, 2010
when I die
Sometime in the future, (could be tomorrow, could be next week) I'm going to die. Chances are good that I won't be happy about this. So, to make it easier on me, I've decided to include in my will several silly things as my final requests. Therefore, the people I know will have to do these things out of respect of my memory. Suckers.
And I will be in heaven, looking down with Jesus, Allah, Buddha, Michael Jackson, Brittany Murphy, and assorted others as you people have to do all the things I've laid out for you. We will laugh. And not just cause heaven's air is made of laughing gas.
Here's what I've got so far:
1) shown at calling hours in casket made of delicious waffle cone.
2) Play "Thriller" by Michael Jackson during memorial service and do robot dance.
3) Read eulogy in style of auctioneer.
4) Sever body into 9 pieces, bury one in each province.
6) Except head, which should be frozen. Everyone will get to carry it around for a week like the Stanley Cup. Also can etch name into side of face.
7) Instead of hearse, tie me to top of car roof, like carcass of dead Kudu.
8) Cars in funeral procession must have bumper sticker that says "Honk if you're horny!"
And yes, I know you bastards will bury me in a shoe box at Oribi Gorge. That's fine too.
And I will be in heaven, looking down with Jesus, Allah, Buddha, Michael Jackson, Brittany Murphy, and assorted others as you people have to do all the things I've laid out for you. We will laugh. And not just cause heaven's air is made of laughing gas.
Here's what I've got so far:
1) shown at calling hours in casket made of delicious waffle cone.
2) Play "Thriller" by Michael Jackson during memorial service and do robot dance.
3) Read eulogy in style of auctioneer.
4) Sever body into 9 pieces, bury one in each province.
6) Except head, which should be frozen. Everyone will get to carry it around for a week like the Stanley Cup. Also can etch name into side of face.
7) Instead of hearse, tie me to top of car roof, like carcass of dead Kudu.
8) Cars in funeral procession must have bumper sticker that says "Honk if you're horny!"
And yes, I know you bastards will bury me in a shoe box at Oribi Gorge. That's fine too.
Monday, June 14, 2010
Dear Winter
Dear Winter
Would you be so kind as to just go away you stupid arse. I did not appreciate you crawling into bed with me last night. I did not enjoy the way you ran your hands down my back or pressed your icy feet against mine. Which had been nice and toasty at the time.
I think you are rude. I find you obnoxious and inconsiderate. I think you should bugger off.
Regards,
Wozzel
Ps. Your brother, Summer, I think he is quite hot. Let him know I said so?
Would you be so kind as to just go away you stupid arse. I did not appreciate you crawling into bed with me last night. I did not enjoy the way you ran your hands down my back or pressed your icy feet against mine. Which had been nice and toasty at the time.
I think you are rude. I find you obnoxious and inconsiderate. I think you should bugger off.
Regards,
Wozzel
Ps. Your brother, Summer, I think he is quite hot. Let him know I said so?
Friday, June 11, 2010
Jean-Luc
Here in Durban there is an old market space known as “The Stables”
Very popular place amongst us Durbanites and touristy type people, The Stables used to be, well, old horse stables now converted into a Market. There are lots of interesting little shoppes. Food stalls and a beer tent :)
There is also one stall filled to the brim with some of the oldest stuff ever. Very antiquey. A year and a half ago the boyfriend and I were rummaging through all the goodies in this little stall when we came across the most horrible little porcelain figurine I had ever laid my eyes on. The boyfriend thought it was most unusual and completely fell in love with it.
Over the last few months every time we go there we see the same figurine sitting there on the shelf. I of course made comment on the fact that it was so ugly no one could possibly want it.
Well… guess what? The boyfriend decided that finally he had enough of seeing it there. He decided, he was going to buy it.
I begged and pleaded that he not buy this thing, as I refer to it, but no, he would not listen. He bought it. He even bargained it from the lady from R10.00 to R5.00 – I personally thought that if anyone wanted to buy it, these people should have just given it away for free.
Anyhoo – said “thing” was bought and placed on the shelf in our room. IN OUR ROOM!! And I see it everyday. It was even named… Jean-Luc.
Pic below. Someone pity me please…
Very popular place amongst us Durbanites and touristy type people, The Stables used to be, well, old horse stables now converted into a Market. There are lots of interesting little shoppes. Food stalls and a beer tent :)
There is also one stall filled to the brim with some of the oldest stuff ever. Very antiquey. A year and a half ago the boyfriend and I were rummaging through all the goodies in this little stall when we came across the most horrible little porcelain figurine I had ever laid my eyes on. The boyfriend thought it was most unusual and completely fell in love with it.
Over the last few months every time we go there we see the same figurine sitting there on the shelf. I of course made comment on the fact that it was so ugly no one could possibly want it.
Well… guess what? The boyfriend decided that finally he had enough of seeing it there. He decided, he was going to buy it.
I begged and pleaded that he not buy this thing, as I refer to it, but no, he would not listen. He bought it. He even bargained it from the lady from R10.00 to R5.00 – I personally thought that if anyone wanted to buy it, these people should have just given it away for free.
Anyhoo – said “thing” was bought and placed on the shelf in our room. IN OUR ROOM!! And I see it everyday. It was even named… Jean-Luc.
Pic below. Someone pity me please…
Wednesday, June 9, 2010
They say your eyes are the window to your soul.
They say your eyes are the window to your soul.
Can you see my soul?
Can you see what it looks like?
Can you tell me its colour?
Can you hear what song it sings?
Can you really see my soul?
What is my soul doing?
Who is my soul with?
Where does my soul go?
When did my soul first come to this earth?
Is my soul happy -
Is it sad -
Is my soul he or she?
Is my soul African? Is it European?
Maybe Chinese? Perhaps Indian?
Does my soul really care about crap like that?
I wonder what language my soul speaks.
Sometimes I just don’t understand him/her/it
I think my soul is happy –
I think my soul sings –
I know; because sometimes I sing along.
I think my soul likes me…
Which is good because I quite like it.
xXxXxXx
“Eyes so transparent that through them the soul is seen”
~Theophile Gautier~
"The eyes have one language everywhere."
~George Herbert~
"The eye is the jewel of the body."
~Henry David Thoreau~
"The eyes indicate the antiquity of the soul."
~Ralph Waldo Emerson~
this is how you can piss me off!!! uuurgh!!!
I’m so irritated right now I can not even begin to tell you how I feel. I heard a story on the radio this morning that has been making a few headlines around the world over the last two weeks – and it’s the recent update that has me annoyed.
Anyone heard about the gay couple in Malawi who got married some two weeks ago, only to be prosecuted by the government – because homosexuality is illegal in the country? So, the world gets all up in arms about it and people are rallying behind this gay couple shouting “Equal Rights” and all that jazz… only, now I hear this couple have split. Two weeks later.
Oh, it gets better. The one dude is now miraculously straight! And in love with a woman he intends tying the knot with. I can not actually fully convey how much this displeases me.
And why? Not because “maybe” he is in love (I’m all for love) – but because I feel that this just fucks up the entire situation. Throws a spanner in the works. Sets Gay Rights one times MASSIVE leap back for all gay couples in the country, because the way I see it these two are now just playing a very silly game.
I’ve taken the liberty to do a bit of a cut and paste here. You can follow this nice long link here to read the original article… http://www.iol.co.za/index.php?set_id=1&click_id=3095&art_id=nw20100608162610615C301288
“Lilongwe - A gay Malawian couple whose 14-year prison sentence for their love affair led to international condemnation has split over a girl, a newspaper report said on Tuesday.
Malawi's leader pardoned the two men in late May on humanitarian grounds after a meeting with UN Secretary-General Ban Ki-moon, who applauded the move and urged the country to amend "outdated" laws on homosexuality.
Steven Monjeza, 26, told The Nation, a major local daily, he had left his partner, 20-year-old Tiwonge Chimbalanga, because he had been coerced into the gay relationship and found a better match with a 24-year-old woman named Dorothy.
"I am looking forward to a future with him. I don't care what people say. But I am yet to tell my parents," she told the paper.
Neither of the two men were immediately available for comment.
Monjeza and Chimbalanga were arrested after celebrating their engagement in a traditional ceremony in late December.
They were tried and found guilty in May of sodomy and indecency. The trial became a test case for gay rights in the southern African country.
Activists and the international community welcomed their pardon, with the White House urging an end to "the persecution and criminalisation of sexual orientation and gender identity".
Homosexuality in Africa, which is illegal in most of the continent's 53 countries, has become a contentious issue in recent months after a Ugandan lawmaker proposed a bill including the death penalty for some acts, police raided a gay wedding in Kenya and the Malawian couple were arrested.
Major donors to aid-dependent Malawi had condemned the jail sentence as an abuse of human rights and warned it could hurt support for Malawi's economy”
• Reporting by Mabvuto Banda
Anyone heard about the gay couple in Malawi who got married some two weeks ago, only to be prosecuted by the government – because homosexuality is illegal in the country? So, the world gets all up in arms about it and people are rallying behind this gay couple shouting “Equal Rights” and all that jazz… only, now I hear this couple have split. Two weeks later.
Oh, it gets better. The one dude is now miraculously straight! And in love with a woman he intends tying the knot with. I can not actually fully convey how much this displeases me.
And why? Not because “maybe” he is in love (I’m all for love) – but because I feel that this just fucks up the entire situation. Throws a spanner in the works. Sets Gay Rights one times MASSIVE leap back for all gay couples in the country, because the way I see it these two are now just playing a very silly game.
I’ve taken the liberty to do a bit of a cut and paste here. You can follow this nice long link here to read the original article… http://www.iol.co.za/index.php?set_id=1&click_id=3095&art_id=nw20100608162610615C301288
“Lilongwe - A gay Malawian couple whose 14-year prison sentence for their love affair led to international condemnation has split over a girl, a newspaper report said on Tuesday.
Malawi's leader pardoned the two men in late May on humanitarian grounds after a meeting with UN Secretary-General Ban Ki-moon, who applauded the move and urged the country to amend "outdated" laws on homosexuality.
Steven Monjeza, 26, told The Nation, a major local daily, he had left his partner, 20-year-old Tiwonge Chimbalanga, because he had been coerced into the gay relationship and found a better match with a 24-year-old woman named Dorothy.
"I am looking forward to a future with him. I don't care what people say. But I am yet to tell my parents," she told the paper.
Neither of the two men were immediately available for comment.
Monjeza and Chimbalanga were arrested after celebrating their engagement in a traditional ceremony in late December.
They were tried and found guilty in May of sodomy and indecency. The trial became a test case for gay rights in the southern African country.
Activists and the international community welcomed their pardon, with the White House urging an end to "the persecution and criminalisation of sexual orientation and gender identity".
Homosexuality in Africa, which is illegal in most of the continent's 53 countries, has become a contentious issue in recent months after a Ugandan lawmaker proposed a bill including the death penalty for some acts, police raided a gay wedding in Kenya and the Malawian couple were arrested.
Major donors to aid-dependent Malawi had condemned the jail sentence as an abuse of human rights and warned it could hurt support for Malawi's economy”
• Reporting by Mabvuto Banda
Tuesday, June 8, 2010
the truth!
I think everyone should be told the horrid truth about exercising. Really it looks so good on TV when you get that montage of people exercising, first they struggle and three shots later they are strong and fit and can run hundreds of miles. Well, ya wha-EVA!!! I started exercising again about 3 weeks ago and I ran twice a day for three days, have now decided only once a day, in the mornings will be good enough, and my body aches, I am not fit or super fast the stupid montage is taking it's time.
I think it's a secret plot by the exercise bunny to get the human race so tired and aching so they can takeover the world. Yes just because I am paranoid does not mean they are not trying to get me.
I think it's a secret plot by the exercise bunny to get the human race so tired and aching so they can takeover the world. Yes just because I am paranoid does not mean they are not trying to get me.
Monday, June 7, 2010
sunrise... sunrise...
That photograph was taken on my little old cell phone. I call it names like “little” and “old” because it is.
It don’t matter.
I took this photograph just the other day.
6am.
Is it not just a stunning sunrise?
One of the reasons I love Durban.
And the colour, I find, is more vivid and brighter, almost, in Winter.
The sea – the sky, the trees and the grass all seem to be bluer, or greener and richer.
And to top that there cherry. Durban and winter don’t even go in the same sentence. For real. This city is always warm… always. Anyone out there going to be in the country / city for any of the Soccer World Cup games?
Aaah, ps – I have some internet access back at work. Only gmail (and blogs are powered by google – bonus)
Lucky me eh?
Naah, lucky you lot methinks…
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